The Onion Makes Me Cry

Just in case you didn't catch this cleverly written article on American Apparel in the recent edition of The Onion, enjoy every sardonic, on-target observation here:

14 American Apparel Models Freed In Daring Midnight Raid

LOS ANGELES—"There were girls everywhere," FBI agent Curtis Froman said. "Draped over furniture, sprawled spread-eagled in the corner, and huddled close like animals."